When I was in high school I worked at a burger restaurant as my part-time job. It has been many years since I worked there but there are two cases of peculiar customer behaviour that I still do not understand. So now we get to play a game, grab your deerstalker caps and magnifying glasses, because we've got some mysteries to solve:
The Case of the Super-Sizer:
I'm working on cash
When a rather large woman approaches
As I'm debating whether I should tell her that horizontal stripes probably wasn't the most flattering choice, she starts to order -
Hi, I would like a regular hamburger
Actually, make that a Double...
Oh, and can I get bacon on that...
And cheese, too, of course...
With a side of fries...
Yeah, make that a large...
With chili on top please...
And extra cheese!
I'm not trying to be mean. Obviously, even though she's overweight she can order whatever she wants... I don't know why she's overweight... it may not be from eating incredibly calorie-laden fast food, it could be genetic, or a gland problem, whatever.
But here's the part that got me:
ME:
Sure mam, would you like a drink with that?
HER:
Oh yes, what flavours of diet cola do you have?
Oh come on!
If you're ordering a huge bacon burger with cheese and everything AND incredibly loaded fries, being concerned about whether you're drinking diet vs. regular pop is like a vegetarian eating a steak and then worrying if the side soup contains beef broth. If you're going to go for it, just go for it. Like cool kids say when peer pressuring their friends to drink more at parties: Go Big or Go Home!
P.S. Before you say anything, I know that picture of the customer is unrealistic and exaggerated.
No one's hair is that red.
Next up:
The Case of the Picky Pickler
This day I'm working in the "dressing" area of the store, this is where people come and they get to choose what condiments they would like on their burgers.
So I ask the next customer what he would like on his burger.
Yeah, hi, I'll have lettuce, tomato, cucumbers, ketchup, mustard...
and then, he looks me straight in the eye, and says the following slowly. Emphasizing. Each. Word.
And... Exactly. Two. Pickles!!!!!!!!
So what's with the specificity?
Maybe he thinks I am a lunatic who is going to put a ridiculous amount of pickles on his burger unless I'm reigned in with his harsh demands.
Or maybe he is the scientific type who has previously conducted a pickle experiment
Fist he tried a burger with 1 pickle, and thought to himself "no, that's not nearly enough pickle". So he tried a burger with 3 pickles, but realized that was too much pickle, so then he tried a burger with 2 pickles and found that it was just right!
Then he realized he was a little girl with a fondness for crime and porridge.
Seriously though, I've taken science classes, that sort of experiment wouldn't work due to the nature of the pickle: its size is highly variable. 1 hearty pickle can easily give the same volume of pickleness as 2 size-challenged pickles.
You might think this is ridiculous, but it's not. And as a professional "dresser" I was more than qualified to put an appropriate amount of pickle(s) on the burger.
So detectives, any thoughts as to why Super-Sizer would choose diet cola when clearly calorie-counting is not a priority? Or why does the Pickler need two pickles only?
So detectives, any thoughts as to why Super-Sizer would choose diet cola when clearly calorie-counting is not a priority? Or why does the Pickler need two pickles only?
